the beautiful letdown

take me on a trip i'd like to go someday

Sat, 14 Nov 2009 15:59:14 GMT

KL Twin Towers, taken a month ago

sorry for the prolonged absence-- i've been off discovering myself, reassessing my priorities and having tons of fun!

i've got to run off yet again, busy bee that i am, but as for now, i'm lovin' life and i've never felt so glad that i'm in Malaysia! expect an update soon.

toodles,

xx Winnie

starlets

Wed, 28 Oct 2009 08:19:16 GMT

OMG HOW ANY MORE PRECIOUS CAN THIS GET?! *so* cute. and i quote kimberly01 from Twitter, FLAIL ADAM, FLAIL. YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO!

/flail

something to be

Sun, 18 Oct 2009 16:06:58 GMT

so guess what; after months of sitting around doing nothing, things have finally started going for me! the lady from IDP who has been handling my transfer to RMIT in Aus called up the other day, saying that if i wanted to accept my offer to RMIT i'd better do it now or else there would be no more spots. so two hours later, i pulled on my Zara denim leggings and my "i'm the most important thing in the world" shirt and made my way down to Subang and sealed the deal.

i'm officially going!!!! still can't believe it. i'm going to be somewhere else away from home for the first time ever in a couple months! not celebrating Chinese New Year next year will suck, but i guess i'll have to deal with the lack of red packets next year. i *am* getting older anyway. can't wait to see Hoi and the kids, and explore the city with an open mind. just thinking about it makes me happy :)

i received birthday money today! still thinking if i should save it or splurge on a new pair of navy blue flipflops since my usual black pair (that have lasted me 2 whole years, maybe more, btw) have been worn to death and the soles are kind of worn out *shy*. those purple ones from Zara look tempting as well...

Terry says he's going to send me a care package consisting of Cheetos after i announced over Skype that i had no idea what Cheetos were. we were playing Draw My Thing on omgpop.com, and i was kicking serious ass until Terry got the word 'Cheetos'. So he drew this packet with orang oblong shaped things inside and everybody was like CHEETOS! but little old me was still typing out things like "POTATO CHIPS" and "POTATOES" and "ONION RINGS"! -_- so after Matt got it with a triumphant "HA! BEAT YOU, MOTHASUCKAS!" i hit the "Cheater" button and went, "WTF? I'M ASIAN, WHAT THE FUCK ARE CHEETOS?" and everyone laughed at me. wtf. Malaysians don't get Cheetos okay. i was told they were something like Cheezels, and i googled them but they don't look like Cheezels to me? :( how unfair is this!?!

i'm looking at pictures of rooms to rent online. this one's nearest to my campus, and it looks good :) these pictures make me want to travel in time! destination: February, anyone?

Ask away.

Wed, 30 Sep 2009 03:18:24 GMT

From ahhbao:

The problem with LiveJournal:
We all think we are so close, but really, we know nothing about each other.
So I want you to ask me something you think you should know about me.
Something that should be obvious, but you have no idea about.
Ask away.

Anon commenting turned on, srs bzns questions accepted :) Just because i'm procrastinating again, and i'm far too lazy to do anything else on a lazy Wednesday afternoon.

“Reason can answer questions, but imagination has to ask them.”

burn out bright

Tue, 29 Sep 2009 10:15:49 GMT

i'm hearing talk of things that i used to think adults would only say... that adults would only talk about. then it hit me, like a ton of bricks, that we were adults. we're the people that we used to make fun of, the people we pretended to be in fun and games. we're journalists, we're accountants, we're scientists, we're dreamers, believers. time moved so fast, even though it seemed to go on at a crawl.

when did we all grow up all of a sudden?

smile like you mean it.

Wed, 23 Sep 2009 09:36:29 GMT

you know how life's like fucking awesome at one point and then really shitty the next? right. i'm beating myself up over a couple hundred pixels that i will never possibly ever get to meet ever in my entire life. and the thing is? i took in all that crap, and it almost is a part of me, even if it's only been for a week. and ... what are we now? are we stranded, are we floating in a pool of "what ifs" and "what abouts" and "what fors"? are we gone? are we?

smile, like you mean it.

of Vietnamese food and Asian Johnny Bravo haircuts

Tue, 22 Sep 2009 15:54:54 GMT

Vietnamese cuisine doesn't taste as weird as i thought it would. between sips of soda lime, we reminisced about old times, caught up on goings-on in college, made fun of Geoffrey, and watched a perfectly generic, overrated, but yet strangely satisfying comedy about sexes and how opposites attract. it was as if i never left.

dear lee yee,

Fri, 18 Sep 2009 04:06:06 GMT

you just made my entire morning <3

^ this one possibly killed me more than the previous one, if that's even possible. i think i've found my new favorite OTP.

Dooey and Beef. <3<3<3<3<3<3

they're out to get you

Thu, 17 Sep 2009 15:57:51 GMT

today was pretty much uneventful, besides the fact that mom brought home some bak kut teh from Bukit Tinggi for dinner, which always calls for a mini celebration! i think if you ask me where to get good bak kut teh, i would answer "that shop near Bukit Tinggi"... but i'm not going to because that shop doesn't have foo chuk! yeah i know, right. it's a culinary blasphemy. which self-respecting bak kut teh shop doesn't have foo chuk?!?!?!?!

also, in addition to the tech!talk i had yesterday with my dad..... to my absolute horror, he discovered YouTube this morning. yup. YouTube. he's spent the past, oh, i don't know, ten hours playing chinese classical opera music at top volume. i even put Boys Like Girls' Love Drunk on at high volume and the high pitched "AAAEEEAAAAAEEEAAA" even drowned out the nana na na na na na's. needless to say, i spent the majority of this morning cursing the advanced technology in our modern day and age and wishing i had a set of earplugs.

... oh wow. mom's having a go at it now; she's listening to some woman named Fong Fei Fei waddle around stage in concert in an obnoxious purple gown.

my life as i know it is over. good bye.

Imma let you finish, but... part III

Thu, 17 Sep 2009 08:22:28 GMT

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL WINWINWINWINWIN

Imma let you finish, but... part II

Wed, 16 Sep 2009 16:08:38 GMT

"nie? what is Firefox?" this last word is pronounced "Fai-yuh-fox", and uttered really slowly.

i swivel round in my chair. "it's an internet browser, Dad. sort of like Internet Explorer, but much better. sort of. well, i hate it because it's kinda laggy for me."

"what?" dad sits himself down in the swivel chair opposite and faces his computer screen, "so does this mean that this Mozilla is fake? because i thought you could only access the Internet through IE. You explore the internet mah?" dad turns to face me (with a srs face, i kid you not). "by the way ah, what is this thing... Kanye West (pronounced Can-yee Wes) and Taylor Swift (Tay-lerh Swif)? i just go to Google and search for some news then these things pop up..."

Imma let you finish, but...

Wed, 16 Sep 2009 11:42:21 GMT

lol'd so fucking hard.

i just so happen to love the song <3 (The Best Of You - Foo Fighters)

drive all night, never gonna get me

Tue, 15 Sep 2009 09:54:44 GMT

SO GUESS WHO PASSED THEIR DRIVING TEST AFTER LIKE, FUCKING FOREVER?

*grins widely*

frankly, i'm ecstatic. no more early mornings, no more "QUICK WINNIE PUT ON YOUR SOCKS IT'S ANDY IN HIS CAR WAITING FOR YOU OUTSIDE! FASTER PUT ON YOUR SOCKS" (i tend to put socks on like, really slowly, and mom tends to mock me because i do so. hey mom, it's not my fault if my feet want to have an intimate relationship with their socks ok?!), no more "ok now go practice while i go have my breakfast!" (leaving me forlornly in the car going omfg WHAT DO I DO FML) and ESPECIALLY no more stupid hills and that stupid lift clutch/accelerator/handbreak/go combo! i'm fucking happy, can't you tell?

oh right, there *are* some things i'll miss though. i'll miss being all the way across the lot trying to parallel park in lot P1, looking around for Mr. Andy to ask him to watch if i'm doing the steps properly, and then i'd find him like on the other end, holding a frilly red umbrella. he's also the only driving instructor in the entire Perfect Driving Center to have a frilly red umbrella okay. my instructor is fucking cool. 8D also, when i once completed a three-point-turn perfectly, he stood, started jumping up and down and clapped his hands, all while balancing his red umbrella. highly entertaining, i swear.

everyone was so scared today! i met these four girls there, and we spent two hours exchanging parking and jalanraya tips, only to find out that all our instructors taught us different ways of executing the steps so our tips weren't really that effective after all. everyone failed something but me :( the Indian girl (i never got her name, but i know she's doing law) burst into tears after the first section because the JPJ guy didn't see her arm when she stuck it out and failed her straight away. bastard :( i'm happy that i met nice people though! i usually sit in the corner at things like these and wait my turn. didn't really expect someone to turn to me and start talking. i guess they weren't afraid of emo girls, idk.

I NOW OWE TERENCE RIDES. well, once i get a car. i want a secondhand Suzuki Swift, but mom just scoffed when i told her so and went, "But that car looks like a turtle!" WHAT'S WRONG WITH TURTLE-SHAPED CARS?! what is this turtle discrimination!

sigh :(

i guess i'll trudge off to bed. i only slept for like, four hours yesterday before my stupid alarm decided to ring. i woke up with an L-license and now i have a P! :)

PS: i found out that Patrick Swayze passed away while waiting for my name to be called and i went "NOOOOOOOOOO" irl. several people stared while one of the girls i met (she studies in Egypt and is like, *really* pretty :O) went, "Awww, I loved him in Dirty Dancing. Seriously? Fuck cancer." after i told her. we then proceeded to talk about Dirty Dancing, Ghost and Michael Jackson before going back to freaking out about three-point-turns :(

R.I.P. Patrick Swayze!

thunderstealer

Mon, 14 Sep 2009 15:58:55 GMT

LJ, i've missed you. :(

f-list, how are you all doing? i haven't been checking up on you in a long time. i shall, soon!

home again

Wed, 01 Jul 2009 06:34:21 GMT

my heart, that is.

it's been a long time since i felt this whole-- like i was meant to fall asleep in the passenger seat of Terence's Elantra all along, Joan in the backseat, Terence at the steering wheel. we rescued Wen Liang from college, and we bantered all the way to Kota Kemuning. the only missing piece was Huai today. we miss you!!! it's not the same without you. can't wait till we're all back together again.

we piled into the Elantra after picking me up in the morning, headed to OneUtama for some glorious food, a movie, and to cure Terence's itch to para. watching the boy make a beeline for the solitary para machine in the dark arcade once he'd exchanged his dollar note for a token was amusing -- i wonder if i'd miss things back home as much as he would when i go. Joan and i stood back and watched him flail about with some rather graceful spins added into the mix. i think i have a video of him dancing somewhere-- i'll dig it out and try to post it without being noticed.

--

i woke with a smile this morning.

SWEET MOTHER OF GOD

Sat, 27 Jun 2009 11:54:15 GMT

DO I HAVE TO SAY ANY MORE FLAJSDFLJLASDKJFLALSJKDFLKSDJFLKDF

ETA:

*flatlines*

her tears, like diamonds on the floor

Thu, 18 Jun 2009 20:47:05 GMT

ten days ago, i was miserable. fast forward ten days later, and i'm still a wet dishrag, but for entirely different reasons-- similar, yes, but different. at the risk of sounding like a bad romance novela, how many ways can your heart be toyed with and tortured? i've been through a lot, and i've got more to learn, but it was more than i could handle.

i haven't been blogging lately, and i apologize-- i have been forgetting about things that used to make me feel whole, but as of late even the littlest things like writing make me feel guarded. one word, and it could rub a person the wrong way, if you know what i mean, and i don't want to take risks. sometimes silence trumps words.

i wish for this to end. and then maybe, just maybe, i'll feel a little better.

the future is a question mark of kerosene and electric sparks

Mon, 08 Jun 2009 20:17:20 GMT

the exhaustion today was overwhelming. i summed up enough energy to make it through three hours of college, and finally wiped out on my desk: the grand finale.

i'll find time to blog soon about what's going on in my life lately. it's all a large jumble, sometimes hard to interpret and understand, even by me. but hey, life's like that, don't they all say?

as the stars watch in entropy and pain

Wed, 03 Jun 2009 05:21:45 GMT

indefinite.

we are all teetering on thin planks between sky-high buildings, praying that what's been supporting us up won't snap under the weight.

but what if it does? ever wonder if you'd grow wings if you fell by chance? or would you fall splat on the asphalt down below, a bloody pile of skin and bones?

but i'm trying not to think right now. all i want to do is get over to the other side, and get the fear done and over with.

i'll take a deep breath and jump in.

love from germany

Tue, 02 Jun 2009 16:31:50 GMT

this is a friend -- he sent me this unexpectedly after i told him i was swamped with work i didn't want to complete.

made my day. :)

I...

Mon, 25 May 2009 03:30:16 GMT

AM

SO BLEEPIN' EXHAUSTED

and i don't even know why.

*melts into puddle on tabletop*

all your dead fury is not enough

Wed, 13 May 2009 16:14:53 GMT

for this, i have nothing else but love.

i can't wait for the album!

PS: Adam Lambert = MY American Idol, regardless of who wins next week. And Kris, Kris... oh Kris, you blew me away with that second song of yours. I thought the Fray's version was haunting and beautiful and that nothing could beat it, but oh, you threw that thought out of the window and made me worship. For that, you deserve a spot in the finals. Support Kradam, everybody!!!

PPS: some food for thought;

"So today was my first day of my 3 day fast. It wasnt quite as hard as I thought it would be. I didn't really tell my mom and dad until about six in the evening. by "chance" one of my best friends came over after school to hang out and he ended up eating my dinner. ("chance" = miracle from God)

I have started to see what life is like for the starving in Darfur. I cannot wait until Friday when I go back to eating anything and everything. Friday is the goal. but in Darfur, there is no goal. There is no friday when you can eat again. They do not have an end goal like I have. How can they carry on? What is their source of hope? Something too glorious for me to comprehend is at work in the world.

But how amazing it is, that I have not eaten in nearly 24 hours, yet have carried out my daily activities as normal. I have a strength to face my hunger, my "hurricane" with a simple "hello." hunger is not enough to silence me. dead fury is not enough. While I may be empty physically, I am full spiritually. and this will carry me through the next two days of fasting."

happy birthdayyyy bone

Fri, 08 May 2009 09:58:52 GMT

i still have three papers to complete but i'm still so relaxed and happy go lucky
probably knowing that there's going to be booze tonight :p

i'm not going to be posting my project 365 pictures today though i *have* been taking photos... just lazy to resize them in Photoshop because my computer lags the fuck out of me when i do
i'll do it soon! *sheepish smile

woke up this ~~afternoon~~ morning and found out that the goddess aka. Carly Smithson is on Twitter!!!!
"vote for Adam people!" she says, and what she says, she will get, because who dares to defy the musical goddess that is Carly Smithson?

so tonight, as i mentioned earlier, i'm going to head to Decanter to celebrate Joan's birthday with the cousins & some people
it just hit me that she's going to be nineteen
and it seems like it was just yesterday that we were still tiny, skinny (her), overweight (me) sixteen year olds
how time flies :(

happy early birthday boney
thanks for all the memories & many more to come xoxo

argh x22387

Thu, 07 May 2009 16:26:36 GMT

so i mindlessly changed a new layout just for fun and i forgot to save the CSS of my old one
and the creator of my old one deleted that one from his/her webpage because he/she thought he was ugly (but its not!!!!)

so now i'm mega screwed cos i don't like the one i'm using now cos it resizes all my photos, what the fuck
the photo of my toes in a previous entry is now squished sideways and it makes me look like an incompetent noob who doesn't know how to resize photos in Photoshop
but i really like the colors and the font of this thing also

so how lah :(

its either normal layout blog with pretty pictures or nice layout with no pictures at all cos i can't stand ugly pictures

but i want pictures in my blog

HAIH DILEMMA

ETA: fixed!

click

Thu, 07 May 2009 15:53:01 GMT

yesterday, sitting on the floor, between several spoons of Haagen Dazs' Belgian Chocolate ice cream
i watched Kyle prance around
and do weird jumps on stage on the telly

so maybe we still think that one or two members still are douchebags
and we've had our hearts broken by them more times than they've been asked "So, tell us, who's Jenny?" in interviews
but there's no denying that the love for their music is still deep down somewhere

maybe the scars are still there, but our hearts are healed.

Jenny came on my shuffle earlier today while i was in the elevator at TBS
and i just had to smile at the irony

come to think of it, i was in that very same elevator that broke down two weeks ago
was late for class, so i squeezed in the second available elevator with a bunch of people
halfway between the second and the third floor the elevator gave this horrifying jerk and then the next thing we knew the mechanism stopped and the lights went out

so this guy near the front tried the Alarm button and it wouldn't work
at this point i was near hysterical and i kept repeating "Oh my God" out loud
but the others were seemingly unfazed and laughed it off
as if it happened every day -_-

two minutes later the lights popped on and we started moving again
i cowered into the corner, still shaking
and tumbled out of the elevator on the fifth floor, only to find the rest of the floor pitch black because of a power failure

........ thank god there were emergency generators or i would have gotten a heart attack

would be damn ironic if i had my iPod in the elevator and Jenny started playing
and we'd exit the elevator covered in dirt :P